Insertion

Part 10: Fun At the Beach

by Sean D'Anna

=====

Ranma strolled down the street, dressed in a black Chinese shirt
and a pair of black slacks. A pair of Rayban shades hid her eyes from
view as she walked along. Her stroll was lazy and purposeful as she
moved through the crowd of commuters.

"Ah summer," she said as she looked up at the sky and smirked,
taking her shades off.

"What's with you?" muttered Akane as she walked up behind her and
grumbled.

"I look good, I feel good, and this is a beautiful day," replied
the redhead with a confident smirk.

"You don't look that good," snorted Akane irritably.

Ranma merely turned her grin towards her and put her sunglasses on
again. "Yeah. I do."

Akane simply stared at the girl in shock as she continued to walk
along the street. She crossed her arms and turned her nose into the
air when she noticed the gaze of several young men train on the girl
as she walked by. Ranma almost seemed to be dancing as she strolled
down the street. The redhead paused in front of the Cat Cafe and
smirked as she saw the sign hanging there.

"Moved to the beach for the summer. Management." There was a small
map with the location of the new location on it.

"Looks like I'm taking a trip," said Ranma with a small chuckle.
She spun around on her heels and walked away, Akane rushing up behind
her with a confused frown on her face. The redhead paused and looked
at her companion. She turned her head and looked up and down the
street for a moment, noticing the hungry looking gazes of the young
men, and a few of the older ones. "This won't do at all."

Akane blinked. "Huh?"

++++++++++++

Akane blushed as she stepped out of the store and looked down at
herself. "What the hell is this?"

"You've got too loosen up a bit," said the redhead casually as she
pat the girl on her back.

Akane was dressed in black, a tight fitting sleeveless black shirt
with a turtleneck and slacks similar to her fiancee. Both of them were
wearing polished black shoes with flat soles. "I can't wear this."

"It's all about attitude," said Ranma as he placed a pair of
shades on her nose and smiled. "Follow my lead, you'll get it."

"But...Look you pervert," snapped the girl irritably.

"Hey, we went over this already. I've got someone already, and you
ain't her. Relax, and enjoy yourself. You're too uptight right now.
Calm down."

Ranma turned her back too her and glanced back at her. "Keep a
straight face, relax when you walk, and remember. We're damn sexy."

Akane sighed and hung her head. "Look..." The redhead was already
walking away.

"Hey! Wait up!" grumbled the girl as she followed.

It only took about ten feet, Akane found herself moving a little
smoother as she strolled silently through the crowd behind Ranma, a
little to the right of her.

After a moment, she realized what she was doing and paused,
blushing badly. "What am I doing!?"

"Huh?" muttered Ranma as she glanced back at her. "What's up?"

"It's nothing," said Akane as she steeled herself. "I could get to
like this," she thought in confusion as she started walking again.

+++++++++++++

Ranma walked into the Tendo home, and removed her shades in almost
perfect unison with Akane as the strolled through the door.

Kasumi walked out to greet them and paused at the kitchen door.
"Oh my!"

Nabiki turned the corner, she was sipping a drink and stared at
the pair for a moment in silence.

"Hi," said Ranma as she strolled past her with Akane just behind
her.

Nabiki promptly spit her drink across the hall and stared openly,
her jaw hanging open. "Akane?"

The girl blushed, and hung her head as she realized that she was
the one they were staring at. Her father was frozen, his newspaper
hanging limply from his grasp. "Um. Hi. What do you think? Is it me?"

Nabiki seemed to snap out of her stupor in an instant. "Wow! I
never knew you had it in you!" She pat her sister on the back and
walked away cheerfully.

Akane blinked and looked down at herself again. "I guess so."

"Hey Pop," said Ranma as she looked over at her father. "What's
goin on?"

"What are you doing boy?" said Genma as he stood up and glared at
him.

"Goin to the beach," said the girl with a small shrug. "I gotta go
get that pill from that old woman."

Soun shook his head, the surprise of his daughter's new look
wearing off in an instant. "Pardon?"

"That ghoul moved her shop to the beach, I gotta go after her,"
said the redhead with a small shrug.

"To the beach then!" announced Soun as he stood up with a fan in
his hands.

"For Ranma's sake!" agreed Genma.

Nabiki threw her hand up into the air happily. "Yay!"

"How nice!" commented Kasumi.

++++++++++++

Several hours later, Akane stood next to her fiancee with a scowl
on her face. "What the hell?"

The pair had just walked out of the changing booths, and Ranma was
dressed in a very skimpily looking black bikini.

"What is it?" asked the redhead.

"What the hell are you wearing?" gasped Akane as she staggered
back.

"Looks good, ne?" said Ranma cheerfully.

"But...you're..."

"I'm proud of how good I look, you should be too," snorted Ranma
as he noticed her rather conservative one piece.

"What's that supposed to mean?" snapped Akane.

"Well, you've definitely got the body for clothes like this," said
Ranma as she looked her up and down. "You're just too shy, or too
nervous to wear them. I don't get why though."

"Cause I'm not easy! You perverted jerk!" snapped Akane.

"What? You think I am? I'm not easy Akane, I'm impossible," said
Ranma as she put her shades on and grinned.

The girl blinked and stared at her dumbly. "Huh?"

"You've got to learn how to use this kind of thing to your
advantage," replied the redhead as she scanned the beach for a moment.
"Hmmm. Gotta find that ghoul." She grabbed one of the passing boys by
his shoulder, it wasn't hard since an entire group of them had moved
in for a closer look, they were trying too look casual about it, as if
they weren't looking at all. "Hey, I'm looking for a place called the
Cat Cafe," she said coldly.

The boy could feel her gaze on him through the shades, and she
looked like she might hurt him. Not that he would have minded much if
she did. He blushed badly and stammered. "Uh, it's about a half mile
down the beach." He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb in the
direction they had come from.

The girl merely nodded at him and let him go. She paused and
looked towards Akane for a moment. "You coming?"

The girl blinked and turned to face her. "Huh? I guess."

About a quarter of a mile later, the pair walked through the sand.

Ranma looked rather cool and collected, while Akane glanced around
nervously.

"I don't see anything yet," said Akane.

"We've got a little more walking to do first," replied Ranma as
she continued to move forward.

A rather bulky looking man walked up between them and put his arms
on their shoulders. "Hey, you two ladies look lost." He was obviously
a body builder of some kind, and his smile was a devious looking grin.

"I know where I'm going, let's go Akane," replied the redhead as
she shoved his hand away from her in disgust.

The black haired girl nodded and followed after her.

"Hey, come on! Maybe I can help you?" insisted the man as he
jogged up to the pair. "I'm sure I could help you find a good time."
He flexed his arm.

"Go away, we aren't interested," replied Ranma coldly. She had to
put a restraining hand on Akane's shoulder. "Calm down, subtlety," she
whispered to her.

Akane gave the man an evil looking glare, but complied.

"At least let me buy you a drink or something, come on," insisted
the man. He was giving a thumbs up to a group of men who were watching
the scene.

"If you don't leave now, I'm going to hurt you," said Ranma
without turning to face him.

"And how is a pretty little thing like you going to do that?" said
the man with a confident chuckle.

Akane got a rather satisfied look on her face as she slowly turned
to look at him.

Ranma nodded too her and they both slammed their knees into his
crotch at the same time.

The man said nothing, and fell too his knees in pain. Ranma merely
smirked as she pushed her hand against his forehead and sent him down
all the way.

"See, that was much more satisfying than just beating him, wasn't
it?"

Akane looked up at her, not saying a word in reply. She smiled a
little though.

"Here," said Ranma as she handed her the sunglasses she had bought
for her earlier. "I figured you might want these."

Akane took them, and put them over her eyes. The pair strolled
away from the scene, leaving a large group of cheering girls behind
them.

+++++++++++

Cologne hopped back to the small stand where their business was
based for the duration of the summer. She had an empty delivery box on
her cane, and smiled cheerfully.

She paused when she found Mousse sprawled out across the ground.
Ranma was leaning against the wall calmly, her foot planted on his
back firmly.

"Son in law, I wasn't expecting to find you here," said the old
woman calmly.

Ranma smirked and removed her sunglasses. "You didn't tell me you
were moving, Boss."

"I thought you might enjoy a small break," said Cologne
cheerfully. "What brings you here?"

"I figured you might need a little help, carrying around that pill
all the time must be a terrible strain on your neck," said the redhead
calmly.

"How kind of you," said Cologne cheerfully. "Come with me then."

"Hey Akane, looks like this might be interesting," said Ranma
coolly.

The black-haired girl stood up from where she had been sitting on
the beach nearby, watching the pair converse.

"And who might this be?" said Cologne as she looked the girl up
and down.

"Just a friend of mine, nothing to worry about," said Ranma in
reply.

Cologne nodded. "I see."

++++++++++++

"It's a race! It's a war!" cried the announcer excitedly as he
attempted to draw a crowd.

"Martial arts melon splitting?" said Akane as she stared at the
sign hanging over the event.

"Looks easy," snorted Ranma calmly. She was leaning against one of
the signposts and looked rather bored.

"The contestants run while trying to split each other's
watermelons. The first to reach the finish line with his melon intact
wins!" explained the announcer.

The crowd around him began to disperse.

"And the prize for the winner is... Miss Shampoo!"

The Amazon girl stood on a podium with the pill hanging from her
grasp. Every male in the crowd suddenly had his full attention on the
prize.

"An interesting little game," commented Ranma.

"Indeed, if you want to win, you have to play," said Cologne.

Akane turned to see her family had been attracted by the
commotion.

Ranma was currently still leaning against the pole, her gaze
hidden by her sunglasses. Shampoo was staring her down angrily.

"Shampoo make sure you no win," said the Chinese girl.

The redhead merely snorted and stood upright. "Sounds like fun."

++++++++++

On your marks! Get set! Go!" cried the announcer as he started the
race.

Ranma immediately dispatched her competition, slicing through
everyone else's melons in an few seconds. She snorted and casually
tossed aside the boken she had been given. "Easy."

Cologne dove from the sky, slamming her cane into the ground and
forcing Ranma to move aside.

"So, you decided too play too then?" said the redhead as she
cracked her knuckles.

"Don't get me wrong, I was just remembering the times I had
playing on the beach as a child," said Cologne cheerfully.

Their battle was interrupted as Soun and Genma charged in. Genma
was currently a panda, and they both converged on Ranma, trying to
shatter her melon.

The redhead dodged and spun around to face them. "Humph. Stay out
of this."

"What do you think you're doing?" snapped Soun.

"We came for that pill, and I'm going to get it," said Ranma
calmly.

"How dare you try and win that girl!" said the panda's sign.

"I can't marry her if I'm stuck a girl, can I?" said Ranma with a
confident smirk.

Cologne watched carefully as the trio faced off.

"Shampoo, no let girl win race! Kill!" snapped the Amazon as she
jumped over the pair's heads and landed in front of Ranma. She sliced
at the redhead with her own boken and missed by a hair's length as the
girl sidestepped.

Ranma chuckled and put her foot through the girl's melon as she
passed. "Looks like you're out."

"The prize has entered the fight! And has already been
disqualified!" exclaimed the announcer.

Shampoo glared up at him angrily, her face covered in sand from
her landing. He gulped nervously and turned his attention back towards
the race. "The old woman, the young girl, the older man, and the panda
are all that remain!"

"Make your choice!" said Soun as he and Genma shoved Shampoo and
Akane in front of the redhead.

Ranma looked at the both of them, and merely stepped back.

Genma and Soun suddenly realized something was wrong, as the two
girls in front of them began to glow.

"Saotome?"

"Growf?"

Ranma shrugged her shoulders and casually walked by the group as
the two idiots were pounded by the two angry girls. She had her melon
hefted onto her shoulder and calmly moved towards the finish line.

Cologne dove from above yet again and landed in front of him. "I'm
afraid I can't let you win that easily. I won't let you pass until you
promise to choose Shampoo."

Ranma merely smirked at her and nodded her head.

+++++++++++

"We're going to try that new technique out," said Carrot as they
stared at the old woman.

"What?" said Ranma dumbly. "Isn't that a bit much?"

"No, not with this old hag," said Dan calmly. "You want me to
wait?"

"For now, we may need that extra kick," commented Carrot. "You
lead Ranma, this is your department."

"Right," said the boy in reply. "This is hard to do though. How
are we going to manage?"

"Time the moves, we'll use our own heartbeat as a beat counter.
It'll be a lot easier if we do it that way, it's just like we
practiced it," said Carrot.

++++++++++

Cologne and Ranma clashed as the redhead charged forward. The old
woman easily blocking the girl's strikes with her cane.

"You're a hundred years too young to keep up with me!" cackled the
old woman merrily.

"I ain't even started yet!" cried Ranma as he thrust his arm
forward.

Cologne narrowed her eyes and jumped up, leaving an opening to her
melon. She launched her cane forward intending to take his out at the
same time.

She missed.

"What? How?" snapped the old crone as she stared at the girl in
shock. The strike should have been much too fast for her to dodge.

Ranma was smiling just beyond her reach. "Surprised?"

"Very. Who could have known you were good enough to split my
melon?"

Ranma narrowed her eyes and held her melon behind her back. "Looks
like I win then."

"Hardly, you've still got to get by me," snapped the old woman
with a small unhappy looking glare.

"Easy enough," said Ranma with a small smirk on her face.

"If you win, I shall give you the Phoenix Pill, and if I win, you
return too China with my Shampoo. How does that sound to you?"

The redhead smirked, she had been expecting this. "You got a
deal."

Cologne charged forward, intent on putting a quick end to the
fight now.

Ranma merely smirked, and a soft glow formed around her body.
"Kaio ken!"

Cologne gasped as the redhead blasted forward. "What is this?" She
found herself slammed into the ground as the redhead kicked her in the
back after vanishing from sight and reappearing in front of her. She
staggered back to her feet and turned to see the girl standing just in
front of the finish line, the glow still throbbing around her body.
"What? How?"

"Come on ghoul, I'll give you another shot," said the redhead with
a confident smirk.

Cologne narrowed her eyes and dashed forward, surrounding Ranma as
she spun around her with the Splitting Cat Hairs technique. The
redhead merely stood in the middle calmly, while Cologne threw sand up
at her from every direction.

Instead of attacking one of the images as Cologne had expected,
Ranma jumped straight up into the air. "She's more foolish than I
thought, that strike must have been a fluke." She stopped and waited
for the girl to come down.

Ranma smiled as she saw the old woman stop, and the glow formed
around her body again. "Kaio ken!" she vanished in mid-air and
appeared behind Cologne, kicking her like a football into the air.
Instead of stopping, she vanished again and appeared behind the ghoul
as she landed, connecting with a punch to the old woman's gut.

"Impossible! No one can be this fast!" muttered Cologne as she was
thrown into the air again, and came down against the girl's knee. The
attack stopped, and she staggered to her feet. She glared at the
finish line again, and saw the girl standing on the other side. "How?
What technique is this? I've never seen anything like it!"

"Heh, that's a secret," replied Ranma as she winked at the old
woman. "You owe me a pill."

"Very well," agreed the old woman reluctantly. She nodded towards
Shampoo.

"Great Grandmother?" gasped the girl in shock.

"Give it too her Shampoo, I gave her my word of honor," snapped
the old woman angrily.

The girl glared at Ranma hatefully and tossed the pill to her. She
caught it and smirked as she opened the box and popped it into her
mouth. "One more thing ghoul, that attack..."

Cologne narrowed her eyes and stared at her. "Yes?"

"That was only at half strength," said Ranma as she turned away
from the old woman and walked over to her dumbstruck family.

"What?" gasped Cologne. "That's not possible!" She was not
referring to the girl's comment, but rather the strange energy she had
felt in the air during the battle. She was going over it in her mind
over and over. If it wasn't some sort of illusion, the redhead's chi
was doubling in spurts, each time she attacked with the Kaio ken.
"Doubling your own fighting power in an instant? That isn't possible!"
She turned towards her Great Granddaughter and motioned for her to
follow. "We're leaving."

++++++++++++++

"That was cool!" exclaimed Akane as she stared at the redhead in
awe.

"Most impressive," agreed Nabiki with a slight nod.

"Oh my! I hope that old woman wasn't hurt too badly," muttered
Kasumi.

"Don't worry, she's fine," said Ranma as she waved the comment off
and looked at her father and Soun.

"Boy! How dare you develop a secret technique without telling me!"
said the panda's sign.

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret technique would it?"
replied the girl with a rough snort.

"He's got a point, Saotome," commented Soun.

"How could you?" said the panda's sign as he looked towards his
old friend.

"Can you show me how to do that?" asked Akane.

"No, sorry. You have to have something special inside you for it
to work. I've never met anyone else with it besides me," said Ranma
with a slight smirk.

"You don't think I'm good enough? Is that it?" snapped the girl
irritably.

"You couldn't learn it if you were as good as I am," replied the
redhead with a small shrug. "It's got to do with my curse."

Genma turned and stared at the boy for a moment, as if he suddenly
realized something. "So, that's it? Is it?" said the sign as he
narrowed his eyes at the girl.

"You've got it, Pop," replied the girl calmly.

Akane looked disappointed, but seemed to accept that answer.

"Come on, let's go home. I'm sick of being a girl," said Ranma as
she started towards the changing room and flipped her shades on again.

The silence on the beach was suddenly shattered, as screams began
to sound from a short distance away.

"Huh?" muttered Ranma as she turned to face the disturbance.

"What's going on?" asked Akane out loud.

A gigantic beach ball with arms and legs was tearing down the
beach, smashing things.

"What the hell is that?" said Ranma dumbly. He paused when he saw
a familiar figure running down the beach away from the thing. Turning
towards his family he frowned. "Go home. I've got to go talk with
someone."

"What?" gasped Akane in shock. "You aren't going to try and fight
that thing are you? I'll help!"

"Do I look that stupid?" said the boy angrily. "The Sailor Senshi
just got there." He pointed down the beach. Sure enough, the five
girls were fighting with the monster already.

"I just saw a guy I know running away, go on without me. I wanna
catch up with him. I'll be back later."

++++++++++++

Jadeite rushed through the crowd with an angry scowl on his face.
"Damn! Those stupid senshi! How cold they have found out about my
operation! Stealing energy with those evil seashells was a perfect
plan!"

He gasped for breath and paused as he ran into a young boy who
moved in front of him. "Out of my way!"

"Hey. Is that yours Jadeite?" said Ranma. He was once again in his
male form, and dressed in his Chinese clothes again. He pointed at the
gigantic youma and frowned.

"Huh? How do you know..." sputtered the dark general dumbly.

"Come on, you recognize your old friend Genaku don't you?" said
Ranma cheerfully.

"Huh?" muttered the evil general dumbly.

"It's been a while. How've you been?"

"Genaku? What are you doing here? How? I mean, you're..." Jadeite
seemed to realize something and snarled at the man. "So! You've been
reborn to oppose us as well!"

"Oppose you? Why would I do that? Those crazy chicks are trying
too kill me too," snapped Ranma irritably as he smacked the man in the
back of his head.

"What?" said the general dumbly.

"I ain't figured it out yet, they don't like me for some reason
though," said Ranma with a small shrug.

Jadeite blinked. "So, we share a common enemy?"

"Seems like it. Man, look at em! They can't even defeat a giant
inflatable ball?"

"Diamos comes to mind," said Jadeite calmly.

"Serenity forgave me for that," said Ranma angrily.

"There was also that incident involving the polar caps of the
moon, and five billion gallons of instant Ramen."

"Hey! It ended that famine didn't it?" said Ranma sourly.

"Or the time you sent that gigantic shipment of exploding
marshmallows to the Senshi of Mars?"

"I helped clean it up," grumbled Ranma with his arms crossed over
his chest.

"By showering the entire planet in chocolate bars and gramcrackers?"
pointed out Jadeite.

"Hey, Serenity and her daughter were happy with it," said the boy
with a small shrug.

"Or the time you poured a hundred billion pounds of powdered
gelatin into the oceans of Venus?"

"Okay! I get the point!" snapped Ranma irritably.

"So, why don't you join us? We could use a man like you," said
Jadeite calmly.

"Naw, think I'll stay neutral this time," said the boy with a
small shrug.

"It's a shame. I would have enjoyed working with you again," said
Jadeite with a small shrug. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I dunno. I'm just getting my memories back recently. So, how have
you been?"

"Fine I guess," muttered Jadeite.

"Hey, I'll buy you a drink," said Ranma as he motioned for the
evil general to follow.

++++++++++++++

"All our attacks are bouncing off if it!" cried Venus as a few
more of her crescent beams bounced off the plastic surface of the
monster.

"What can we do?" said Mercury desperately.

"I'm not sure!" said Mars. "Don't just stand there you airhead! Do
something! You're the stupid leader!"

"Wahhhh! I hate the beach!" cried Usagi as she dashed away from
another blast of sand.

The creature was scooping up tons of it and blasting it at them
with some sort of air nozzle. It would then puff itself up again and
renew the assault.

"What is this thing made of asbestos?" snapped Mars as her flame
attack bounced off of its back.

"It's flame retarded!" exclaimed Venus.

"Looks like you ladies could use some help," said Tsuki as she
strolled up behind them with a confident looking smile on her face.

"So do something! You klutz!" snapped Mars.

"I am not a klutz!" snapped Tsuki as she glared at the girl and
stomped her feet. Her foot hit a nearby beach chair, and knocked it
over. The chair hit a nearby umbrella, and created a chain reaction,
as the giant umbrella hit yet another one, and another one. Several of
them were lined up along the beach, and they fell like dominos. The
final one, ripped a gash in the side of the youma's skin, and it
promptly screamed as it deflated into nothing.

"See," said Mars as she pointed at her.

"I'll have you know I meant to do that!" snapped Tsuki irritably
as a long staff appeared in her hand. She vanished into a porthole
that opened into the air behind her and left them alone.

"She sure is mysterious," commented Usagi.

"The only thing mysterious about her is the fact that she's a
bigger klutz than you," said Rei.

"Gee, thanks Rei!" The girl paused as the statement sunk in a
little more. "Hey! What's that supposed to mean!"

"Calm down!" said Makoto as she attempted to halt the argument.

"She's right, our real enemy has escaped," said Ami as she stared
down the beach.

"He'll show up again," said Minako coldly.

"Unfortunately, you're right," said Luna as she walked up to them
with Artemis at her side.

"Yeah! We'll get him next time!" exclaimed Usagi.

Minako sighed and shook her head. "This guy seems different from
that other enemy."

"The man who killed that other senshi?" asked Ami nervously.

"Right," said the girl with a small frown. "Compared to him, this
was nothing."

"You're scaring me!" exclaimed Usagi nervously.

"Some fearless leader," grumbled Rei as she turned away from the
scene. "Come on, before the cops show up."

+++++++++++++

Jadeite and Ranma were rolling with laughter as they sat at the
bar.

"I remember that now! I used about twenty five million gallons of
yellow dye, and an interplanetary water cannon!" said Ranma as he
pounded his fist on the counter of the small bar they had found
themselves in.

Jadeite had tears flowing down his face as he chuckled.
"It..it...it took her three years to clean it up. You're name was
written across the equator of Pluto for three...three years!"

"Oh. I'm starting to realize why they want to kill me," said Ranma
as he wiped his own eyes. He tossed some money on the counter and pat
Jadeite on his back. "It was nice talking with you again, but I've got
to get home. My family will kill me if I'm gone for too long."

"Beryl, she'll know about you," said Jadeite as he calmed down
suddenly.

"So what? Tell her, that blowhard. I'm of no use to her, and she's
got better things to do than hunt me down," said Ranma with a slight
smirk.

"Nephrite might not be so kind," said Jadeite with a slight smirk.
"I've got my own missions to complete, and I personally won't be
bothered with hunting you down. But him..."

"He's still mad about that?" said Ranma dumbly.

"Pissed," confirmed Jadeite calmly.

"It was just a little novocaine," said the boy with a small frown.

"It was his wedding night," pointed out Jadeite.

"Oh, right..." muttered the boy as he hung his head. "Well, look
me up sometime. I'm sure I can handle that moron anyway."

"Suit yourself," replied Jadeite with a small shrug. "I'll see you
around."

"Right," said Ranma with a small nod as he left the bar.

+++++++++

TBC...